Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Keith Dennis Turns 40
Forty really is a turning point so along that line let me print Forty Thoughts On Turning 40.
1) At 40 you are no longer the young and upcoming fast track person but now the senior member of the team
2) Your next boss will be younger than you
3) New hires, straight out of college, are coming into the firm with salaries at 99% of what you earn.
4) At forty you are where you are going to be for the rest of your life, there is no longer any rapid advancement, if you are not successful by now you will never be.
5) You are no longer tolerant of anyone or anything.
6) You are more inclined to tell people to shut up.
7) When your boss asks you when you can do some urgent task, you feel more free to say: "How about never? Is never good for you?"
8) Gardening is suddenly good.
9) You realize that you are old enough to be the father of most of the models in the Victoria Secret Catalog.
10) Within weeks of turning 40 you will lose the ability to read anything close up; lose part of your hearing; lose much of your short term memory; and apparently, lose most of your humor. You will find reading a ”turning 40” list is not nearly as funny as when you read it at 25.
11) Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size and to add to that the Discovery Channel says those brain cells you have left, starts to slow down at 40.
12) The growth gene for Nose hairs and ear hair will kick in at 40.
13) Your younger colleagues think your libido requires chemical enhancement, or that it's OK to make jokes about the probability that it does.
14) You realize there is no difference between the Republican and Democratic parties.
15) You argue with the television. You always win.
16) Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember
17) You can only call your self middle age if you really think you going to live to be 80 and with your life style that seems remote.
18) People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"
19) People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
20) Things you buy now won't wear out.
21) You can eat dinner at 4 P.M.
22) You enjoy hearing about other peoples operations.
23) You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
24) You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.
25) You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
26) You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into
27) You sing along with elevator music.
28) If you were to ever get on "Dancing with the Stars", you'd be one of the 'older' contestants that the judges will marvel at your ability to still move well.
29) Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
30) Nothing good really begins with the letter "F" - fat, failure, freak, faulty,
31) You don't get smart-alecky black balloons and snarky cards in your 30's.
32) Whoever said you can feel like two 20 year olds, is clearly a liar.
33) People expect you to have some sort of "wisdom" when you get this old,
and clearly, you don't have it, however you are thinking about starting a blog.
34) You are called "Sir" with a lot more frequency.
35) When someone says "You still look so young" - it lacks the sincerity that it
used to have.
36) You have to check a different box on some applications or survey when asks your age.
37) You can't really fit 40 candles on a cake - unless it's a really BIG cake. Then
you're laughed at if you can't blow them all out! Plus 40 candles on a cake creates a really big fireball!
38) In another ten years AARP will start sending you applications to join them.
39) There are new "tests" that the doctor wants to do when you hit 40
40) You are that much closer to death.
Term Life Insurance